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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Ryan Williams' LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, June 2nd, 2009
7:58 pm
Cobwebs
Wow, I've totally forgotten all about this site. Pity.
Saturday, January 31st, 2009
9:44 am
I am not dead
I am not dead. That is all.
Monday, August 11th, 2008
10:16 am
Pulse
Not dead, will post. Soon.

Current Mood: busy
Tuesday, July 15th, 2008
8:32 am
Car wreck
Got rear-ended on the way to work yesterday. I'm fine (more or less), the car is on slightly damaged, and the guy has insurance. So other than a minor annoyance, everything is ok.

Current Mood: annoyed
Saturday, July 5th, 2008
12:04 am
Mexicos
Well, I'm back. I had a week and a half off to soak up all the fun that Texas and Mexico had to offer, and if I didn't quite make it, I was pretty damn close. I spent 5 days in Austin, 5 days in Mexico, and then two final days in Austin. My trip to Austin was long overdue, I hadn't been back since last June. It's the longest I've ever been away from Texas. I got to see my dog Kona, and she was by my side virtually the whole time. I had my good friend Ben McCormick down from North Dakota and got to show him around my town. We hit clubs, the lake, the whole enchilada.

Mexico was, well Mexico. We started in Cancun and ended up in Cozumel. Cozumel isn't nearly as commercial as Cancun, but its still pretty bad. People trying to get you to buy crap wherever you go, shouting at the top of their lungs. I don't have a problem tell them to fuck off, but it does get draining after a bit. Still I went down there for the diving, not the people, and it didn't dissappoint. I went on four dives over two days, and it was incredible. The first two dives were excellent. I was a little nervous getting into the water, but once I did all my dive knowledge came back to me. The current in Cozumel is pretty strong, but since all the dives flowed with the current it just meant that you had to spend less energy swimming. The second day of diving was the most incredible experience I've ever had. We went to this reef, who's name escapes me at the moment, and dove down about thirty feet. We swam along the bottom until we reached these massives rock cliffs, completely covered in coral. The cliffs went up about 30 feet above us, 10 feet shy of the surface, and had these 5 foot wide channels all the way through them that we navigated. We swam through caves and ravines that were absolutely stunning, and we would occasionally get glimpses of endless blue. Then we swam out of the cliffs and we were floating in open water. The cliffs must have been a hundred feet high. Seventy feet below us we could just barely make out the see floor, and the cliffs went up thirty feet over us. We swam along the outside of the cliffs, watching fish flit up and down. It was utterly amazing. The next dive was just as spectacular biologically. I saw a lobster as big as a golden retriever, a large nurse shark swimming with attending pilot fish, a six foot bright green moray eel, a sting ray, six foot barracude, and more fish than I could ever remember. It's really given me a craving to dive more, and I was thinking of trying some wreck diving off the Atlantic coast.

On our final full day in Mexico, Ben, my best friend Matt, and my friend Jen rented a car and trekked into the jungle in search of Mayan ruins. We went out to a rather remote Mayan site call Ek Balam. Its a recently excavated site, 1996, that is still in the process of being completely explored. We hired a local guide to show us around the ruins, and he did a rather good job explaining both the work that was taking place and the discoveries made so far. We got to climb to the summit of the massive temple and look over the endless jungle that stretched in all directions. Ek Balam is still being worked on so one half of the main temple was completely covered in jungle. Like an idiot I forgot my camera, but Ben more than made up for it and took lots of pictures. Soon as I get them from him I will post them. Our trip back was a little perilous. Between running out of gas, getting bogus directions, and retreking the same road 3 times we missed the last ferry back to Cozumel and had to spend our last night in a dive motel in Playa de Carmen.

My last days in Austin are a blur, of movies with a good friend, and drinking with my brother. I must admit my brother and I had a great time. I was utter wasted, having slept less than 9 hours in two days, but we went out and tore it up with his friends and mine. Ben got on his plane, and I was going home a few hours later, but I was supremely confident I got all the fun out of the trip. Anyway, pictures to come, happy 4th of July all.

Current Mood: mellow
Thursday, June 19th, 2008
6:36 pm
CHANGE OF PLANS
We will be doing the lake day on Sunday instead of Saturday so Ben, my friend from North Dakota, can enjoy a little down home Texas fun. Hope this doesn't put a kink in anyone's schedule.
Wednesday, June 18th, 2008
10:34 am
Homeward Bound
Heading home today, and will be arriving at 10:00 tonight. Lake day on Saturday, BBQ, swimming, alcohol, the usual. Anyone and everyone is invited. Respond here with your lame ass excuses on why you cannot come and I will mock you.
Friday, May 30th, 2008
10:12 pm
Breathe Out
So, after two intense weeks of parents, renovations, moving, and buying I can finally sit back and enjoy. My parents have been up here in DC for the last two weeks, and I can honestly say this place is now a home thanks to their efforts. Every day I would come home from work and the kitchen cabinets would be painted, or I would have additional closet space, or they would buy a couple hundred dollars of "house stuff". As my brother put it, they helped me do the work I would have done over the next two years in two weeks.

Still, I am glad that I can finally come home and relax instead of racing off to see furniture or building a new addition to the house. Also, I discovered that a futon mattress on the floor isn't nearly as comfortable as I assumed, so I am very happy to get my bed back.

So, I am settling in, getting used to everything, paying a MASSIVE mortgage payment instead of my usual rent check, the usual things. Its going to be tough owning a place, because those of you who know me well know that I am not the most fastidious person. No no, its true, I could definitely use some better habits. I can already see myself changing and become more aware of what happens in my house, but I still think I have a long way to go.

My buddy Nick has agreed to become my room mate, and I think he and I will get along great. Its definitely going to be a new experience setting the rules and not just obeying them. I just have to remember not to go overboard. Forcing him to laminate his feet might have been a good indication that I'm moving in the wrong direction.

Anyway, pictures are up on my Myspace page (I'm not very talented with the Livejournal stuff) so feel free to take a look. Or, better yet, come by and let me entertain you.

Current Mood: accomplished
Friday, April 18th, 2008
2:24 pm
Home Sweet Home
Well, I have officially purchased my condo. Hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt, and I have never been more excited. I'm already planning what furniture to buy, paint colors, home improvement, everything I always thought other people were crazy for enjoying. I'm still thinking of doing the Steampunk, minimalist Victorian style, but I want to get help from some professionals (i.e. women) before I do anything major.

My parents are coming up from Texas with a bunch of furniture, I'm going to have a housewarming party or two (don't ask) in late May, and my room mate, Nick Norton, should be moving in June 1st. I am definitely nervous, but I think I will be ok, and as long as I don't lose my job in the next few months I should be ok, knock on wood. And now that I have my own place in this world, I expect a couple friends from Austin (and elsewhere) who have been putting off a visit to finally haul their sad asses up here.

I will be taking lots of pictures of the place and all the activities coming up in the next month.

Current Mood: excited
Friday, April 11th, 2008
12:14 pm
Raining Flowers
The Cherry Blossoms are in bloom in DC, and its one of the best times of year to be up here. I went down to the Mall two weeks ago and got tons of pictures of the trees in full bloom. And while it was a sight to behold, my favorite time in the season is happening now. The trees have blossomed and now they flowers are starting to fall off. While that might seem tragically morose, its actually quite stunning to see a gust of wind peel off a couple thousand tiny blossoms and send them raining down. Its like seeing snow on a clear and sunny day. The green grass is littered with white/pink blossoms, and every new gust of wind whips the whole thing up again.

There is poetry in there; dead flowers, snowing pedals, wilting in spring, and so on, but since I am no poet I will simply say its neat.

Current Mood: jubilant
Friday, April 4th, 2008
7:44 am
Happy Birthday to me
So, I'm older but am I wiser. 28 was an interesting, though largely calm year for me. Full of ups and downs to be sure, but nothing earth shattering. The 1st day of my 29th year on the other hand, has a bit more to offer. As of yesterday I am locked into buying my condo. Locked in to my own place in this world, to crippling debt, and a need for a room mate. I am excited to say the very least. Also, other things are afoot that I will not mention here yet. But when the time is right, and things are a bit more certain, I will be sure to share all. So new things all around for me, and 29 already promises to be a year of great gains or great losses. Should be interesting to say the least, now all I need is for that "wisdom" to kick in.

Current Mood: excited
Thursday, March 20th, 2008
8:24 am
SCUBA Trip Invite
I am planning a trip down to Cozumel on June 23rd through the 27th. Cozumel is internationally renowned for its Scuba diving and snorkeling. I have a couple friends coming with me, but there are still one or two spaces available. And since I have no idea which of my friends have scuba license I thought I would put out a general call. You will have to cover the plane ticket (on a Mexican flight it runs about 500 or so, I think) the daily Scuba costs (which run about 80 to 120) and food and frivolity. Should be a good time, we have a place on the ocean and a good dive master lined up, but I am told that other than diving there isn't much else to do so this will be a scuba diver trip only. Let me know if you are interested, and I can provide more details.
Tuesday, February 19th, 2008
7:45 am
The Movie that Squeaked By
Well, since no one got it. The last movie on my list was Gattica, an excellent near future story about discrimination and bodily fluids. I highly recommend it.
Friday, February 15th, 2008
4:57 pm
One Movie Left
Only one, and I won't lie to you....its hard. Not the most widely seen movie, and the quote is kinda obscure. Who's got the moxy?
Thursday, February 14th, 2008
9:29 am
Movie Time
Stolen from Auss24
Pick 15 of your favorite movies.
Then go to IMDB and find quotes for each of them.
Or go to Google, because, frankly, IMDB is missing some of the best.
Post the quotes.
When someone guesses the movie, add the movie name and the person who got it right.
(No fair using IMDB - or Google - to find the answer.)

The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou - Auss24
1) E: It is beautiful Steve.
S: Yea, it's pretty good isn't it... I wonder if it remembers me... 

Dogma - Enkigrl
2) L: Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity anyone can engage in, next to soccer. 

Black Hawk Down - Duncang
3) A: Do you think if you get General Aidid, we will simply put down our weapons and adopt American democracy? That the killing will stop? We know this. Without victory, there will be no peace. There will always be killing, see? This is how things are in our world. 

Army of Darkness - Enkigrl
4) A: Wait a minute....I've never even seen this asshole before! Henry, tell em you don't know me. 

Tremors - Belly78750
5) E: There's no way Walter's getting his slick mits on this for no 15 bucks.
V: You got that right!

Ghostbusters - Gothfru
6) R: Why worry? Each one of us is carrying an unlicensed nuclear accelerator on his back. 

Fight Club - Auss24
7) J: You met me at a very strange time in my life

8) I: How many launches are there each day Vincent? A dozen?
V: Sometimes more
I: You're the only one that watches all of them. If you're going to pretend like you don't care, don't look up. 

Princess Bride - Auss24
9) M: I'm going to do him left handed
V: You know what a rush we're in!
M: Its the only way I can be satisfied. If I use my right hand *pfft* over too quickly. 

Batman Begins - Belly78750
10) R: But a criminal is not complicated. What you really fear is inside yourself. You fear your own power. You fear your own anger, the drive to do great and terrible things. 

Star Wars: Return of the Jedi - Gothfru
11) A: help me take this mask off.
L: But you'll die.
A: Nothing... can stop that now. Just for once... let me... look on you with my *own* eyes. 

The Incredibles - Belly78750
12) H: It's a ceremony!
B: It's psychotic! They keep creating new ways to celebrate mediocrity, but if someone is genuinely exceptional... 

Crocodile Dundee - Duncang
13) S: How does he find his way in the dark?
M: He "thinks" his way. A lot of people believe that they're telepathic.
[Sounds of branches breaking, splashing]
N: OOOOh, God, I hate the bush. 

Boondock Saints - Gothfru
14) C: Do ya know what we need, man? Some rope.
M: Absolutely. What are you, insane?
C: No I ain't. Charlie Bronson's always got rope.
M: What?
C: Yeah. He's got a lot of rope strapped around him in the movies, and they always end up using it. 

Van Wilder - Enkigrl
15) G: What were you doing up there?
V: As Smashed as I am, I'm pretty sure that was my room...Wasn't it?
G: What was that girl, a freshman?
V: She reads at a sophomore level.

Current Mood: amused
Wednesday, February 13th, 2008
3:49 pm
**Warning: This blog is me remembering out loud, very boring** 1, 5, 10
Time stretches behind me. Its strange to look at who you were years ago because you are still very much that person, but you are very different as well.

Ten years ago I was in High School. I rarely, if ever, think back that far but a recent conversation brought me back. I had 3 dedicated friends, Spook Union 1323 (Matt Donaldson, Ed Black, & Christian Brewer). We spent every weekend together and did nothing but watch the occasional movie and role-play all weekend. Werewolf the Apocalypse, Vampire the Masquerade, Changling the Dreaming and stranger things. We'd talk about the stupid "popular kids" and how they were sheep, and didn't understand how the world worked. I'd be grounded by my parents because I would never remember to call them when I got to Matt's house on Friday. I typically didn't show up back at my place until Sunday afternoon, and by typically I mean EVERY weekend. I was in school, and I did well, but I really wasn't thinking about college or my future too much. I was in the marching band, I concealed the fact that I played role-playing games from my parents because they thought they were Satanic. I'd never kissed a girl, not really, and considered myself "above such petty concerns of the flesh". While I never got pierced or tattooed I definitely did the whole "society is a lie" thing. Still, my rebellion was pretty lame all things considered. I was a huge dork, and I was king of the world (as most teenagers are).

Five years ago, I was in my first year of "real school" at Texas State University, San Marcos. I knew I wanted to work for the government, but beyond that I was kinda clueless, and I was probably nervous about looking to far ahead. It would have made me realize that I was going to have to move away to do what I wanted. Kerri and I had been dating for about a year and a half and I think we were going through a rough patch. She was expecting me to mature a bit emotionally and I was lagging behind. Still, I was very much in love with her at this point and couldn't imagine not having her in my life. My parents had just purchased the Lake House a few months earlier and I was enraptured by it. I think I had stopped VLARPing at this point, but I was still hanging with that group. Strangely, its harder to remember anything about this point in my life than 5 years before. Probably because I don't have my senior year of high school to give me a firm mental anchor.

Last year, I had just been given my first analytical assignment and I was sweating bullets because I had no clue what I was doing. All those years of college did nothing to help me put pen to page. I was afraid I would be discovered for the fraud I was and dumped back behind a phone. I had just lost the MrCormick siblings and Anine and was bemoaning the fact that I had so few friends. I was still living with Henry and Grace and had no intention of leaving.

It just seems amazing to me that I was all these different people. I almost feel like I was watching someone else's life. A friend of mine, Christian, once said to me that if he met himself of five years past he would kick his own ass. I don't think I would go that far, but I would certainly clue myself in to a few facts that escaped me at the time. I also know that in five years time I will say the exact same thing, which does make me smile.

Current Mood: refreshed
Monday, January 7th, 2008
8:16 pm
In with the New
New house, new year, new everything. I am finally moved in, mostly moved in actually, and I love it here. A room mate I can talk to, a kitchen I can use, and an entire house to stretch out in. Plus my roommates sister is friggen hot! Kinda conventionally hot, which is not really my taste, but definately worth the trouble. I'll post pictures of the new place soon enough, and maybe if I feel like it give a brief description of the new years bash we through here. Until then, know that I am happy and be happy for me.

P.S. I have a guest room with a bed/futon for any and all visiting guests. So stop on by any old time. Prices and participation may very.

Current Mood: content
Thursday, December 27th, 2007
8:28 pm
Digging through the Past
So, after 23 months of living with Henry and Grace I am finally moving on. This is the longest I've ever lived in one place that wasn't my parents house. To be honest, I feel relieved to be getting out. This house is a microcosm for my reasons for moving to DC in the first place. Comfortable but stiffling. And now I'm moving in with a friend while I continue to look for a place to buy.

I have come across a few things in my life that I felt like had a divine hand. So many factors and vectors line up its hard not to wonder if God was pulling the strings. Without going into the boring details, my needs for temporary boarding and his needs for a short term roommate really lined up. So here I am, digging through the dross of my room. I'm throwing away no small amount of stuff. Some things were lifelines when I first arrived in DC; any financial statement, early resumes, cards from prospective employers. The kind of things that you think might be important. But as I go through them I can't help but shake my head and think back to how different I was just two years ago.

And my old bank statements aren't the only pieces of trash I found that I used to treasure. Now I don't mean to be cruel when I say this, because I made a real effort and I've put everything with Kerri behind me. I hold no grudge. But I stumbled upon some pictures of her, and braced myself for an emotional rush. But honestly, the only thing I wondered was why I was ever really attracted to her and why I worked so long and hard to get her back. Like I said, I'm not trying to be cruel (and failing miserably at that task) but a few years has a way of shifting the most important things in your life into things you wondered why you ever wasted your time with. I guess anything can change in the course of a year.

So, the new place. Its a pad.....a bachelor pad. My "landlord" has HD TVs, every video game system released this century, and his own friggen bar in the basement (I'll provide pictures soon). Suffice to say, I am going to be trading up in living quarters. But talking to Bryan these last few weeks has made me realize that all this time I've been living with Grace and Henry I haven't had roommates. I've had people that lived really close by with no door. I don't know why I never made an effort to connect with them. Maybe because they were married, maybe because they were born in China and the cultural gap was too wide, I dunno. But its going to be interesting living with someone again. Sharing space, talking to people, having friends over. I need to strangle my inner hermit and learn to be a person again. Not only that, but a clean person.

So, Saturday is the move out day. I've got friends coming over and it hopefully won't take too long. Still, I can't shake the feeling that I am about to pass an important milestone. Guess I should take some pictures.

Current Mood: happy
Monday, December 24th, 2007
12:01 pm
Holidays
Merry Christmas everyone.

Current Mood: cheerful
Monday, November 26th, 2007
4:14 pm
Fade in, fade out
15 or 20. That's probably how many Christmas seasons I have left with my family. My whole family. I've been thinking about what time I have left. Not morbid (well maybe a little) but just in terms of enjoying things, savoring things, smelling the roses and all that. I convinced my parents to give my brother a plane ticket to visit me this Christmas. Originally it was just going to be them, but I brought them around to my point of view. I love my family, and knowing that time isn't infinite, that this won't last forever, let's me put them in the forefront of my mind. I started thinking, what else don't I have a lot of?

My Twenties: These suckers are going fast, less than a year and half and I will be 30. That magic number when you are on track to do most of the things you are going to do in your life. Its not a point of no return, but it is a moment to look down at your feet and take note of where they are heading. I'm going to get back into VLARP in the next few months. Ah, how I used to mock those late 20's folk who used to play. "Aren't they a little old to dress up and run around playing rock paper scissors?". The good news is, my impending hypocrisy was visible to me even then, so its not so bad. Still, cruising the mall for legal teenagers is a hobby I probably won't be able to indulge in anymore. Oh well.

Trips to Austin: I love Austin, and all the people in it. But its not the only place in the world. Any vacation time I had would always be used for a trip home. I'd get to see my friends, play some interesting games, and occasionally get laid. And while all those things were great, I think its time to take a look at the rest of the world I am supposed to be interested in. My parents place in Cozumel, my good buddies in New York, and I think a trip to Europe should be in my future (see the 20's section). I will still make trips home, because it is home. But once, maybe twice a years is going to become the rule.

Getting in shape: Ok, I was only ever in shape once, and that was after 3 hellish months in the Corps of Cadets. But now, getting in shape isn't going to be easy anymore. A few months of working out and modest dieting aren't going to net me massive returns in the weight loss and muscle gain departments. I'm an idiot for not getting and staying in shape when it would have been easier. But, well....I'm an idiot. Still, this old man wants to live past 45 so a serious effort must be made.

Easy women: Also, something I never indulged in really, but the fact of the matter is I probably can't hope to breeze into the perfect woman again. I actually have to go looking for her. People won't shut up about online dating services but I simply refuse (and if you can't understand why, go fuck yourself, I don't need to hear your damn opinion on the subject). So getting out and getting social needs to become part of my life again. We'll see how this goes. I've actually made historic steps forward these lasts few months and asked a couple of girls out (one with lackluster results and the other one turned me down) but still, new ground is being gained.

Be an idiot: Those last two are kinda cheats. More so, I should be doing this and my best and easiest opportunities have already passed. This is different. I'm still me, I'm still a jokester, a bit of a prick when I'm not careful, but I don't really enjoy being the reckless idiot anymore. It doesn't thrill me to do things others won't or dare not. Its stupid, and I don't really enjoy it anymore. Sophomoric humor like burping and farting is just stupid and noxious, not really funny at all. Maybe my sense of humor is changing maybe I'm becoming more mature. But my days of dropping my keys in the cheese, running under a christmas tree with a lightsaber, and consuming inedible objects for others amusement are numbered. Strangely, I'm a little more sad than I thought I would be to see them go.

That's not all, but its all I can think of right now. Or possibly, it is all I will let myself think of right now. I'm thinking of becoming a Fed, and getting my masters, and buying a house and all this other stuff, the stupid stuff particularly, is becoming fond nostalgia rather than random impulse. I guess we all grow up eventually and I should enjoy who I am, when I am, for as long as I can.

Current Mood: thoughtful
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